EP 135: Kaleb's Story

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In this episode, Kaleb joins Steve and James for a raw, courageous discussion about his journey through addiction, shame, and recovery after a series of legal consequences and time in jail. Kaleb opens up about facing the labels of "addict" and "sex offender" and the impact they had on his self-image and spiritual life. They emphasizes the importance of maintaining perspective, the power of forgiveness, and the impact of having a positive, future-oriented mindset. This episode provides a heartfelt look at the road from rock-bottom experiences to healing and growth, offering listeners insight into how one man has found purpose and peace amidst profound struggle.

You can connect with Kaleb on instagram @kalebmbarclay and @findingfreedom.pod

EP 134: Live Unashamed- Grace and its Place With Addiction Recovery

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This episode dives deep into the role of grace in addiction recovery. Sam joins hosts Steve and James in a candid conversation about how grace not only fosters personal healing but also helps bridge the gaps in relationships harmed by addiction. The episode unpacks the depth of grace, its transformative power, and its ability to inspire positive change. They emphasize that grace is not a "hall pass" to excuse harmful behaviors but a force that leads to true reconciliation. The discussion also touches on the misconception of using grace to justify actions, the importance of reconciling relationships with God, and the personal journey each individual takes in recovery. 

EP 133: The Lisa Show pt. 2

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Steve and Lisa dive into exactly how to respond to compulsive sexual behavior in your home, especially as a parent. There are now more resources than ever to help families have healthy conversations that appropriately frame sexuality without shame. Steve offers specific language for loved ones starting the conversation with their significant other or child, as well as strategies to protect emotional and physical safety in the meantime. Whether the conversation is with a spouse or a child, it's possible to dispel adrenaline and shame ahead of time, so that family dialogues about sexual boundaries foster trust and healing.

*This is a reposted episode from The Lisa Show Podcast* byuradio.org/the-lisa-show

EP 132: The Lisa Show pt. 1

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*This is a reposted episode from The Lisa Show Podcast* byuradio.org/the-lisa-show

In this special episode, Steven joins Lisa for a conversation about recovery, outlining seven critical aspects of the healing process. They discuss the the most common pitfalls that keep people from healing and recovering, including the "try harder" fallacy, and outdated labels and language. Whether the issue at hand is pornography use, affairs and infidelity, or betrayal trauma, anyone can heal. Steven and Lisa discuss strategies for forming safe communities that foster honesty and recovery, especially in church environments.

EP 131: Live Unashamed- Recognizing Shame

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In this episode, Steve, James and Sam take a new approach discussing the topic of shame. They explore how shame thrives in secrecy and judgment, acting as a tool of negative forces to undermine self-worth. Through personal experiences, they reveal how recognizing and addressing shame—through therapy, spiritual retreats, and open communication—can heal and strengthen personal relationships, especially in marriage. The conversation underscores the necessity of discussing shame openly to identify its sources and mitigate its impacts.

EP 130: Recovery Resources & Masculinity with The Therapy Brothers

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In this episode, Steve and James are joined by the Therapy Brothers, Tyler and Brannon, who are both experienced therapists specializing in marriage, family therapy, and recovery from shame and trauma. They discuss their podcast 'Therapy Brothers' and the retreats they host aimed at helping men and women reclaim their identity and heal emotionally. The conversation explores topics such as healthy masculinity, the importance of experiential therapy, and tips for finding effective recovery resources. The Therapy Brothers emphasize the need for authenticity, courage, and community in the recovery process and share insight into how partners can support each other through trauma and healing journeys.


Connect with the Therapy Brothers here.

EP 129: Live Unashamed- Sobriety vs. Recovery

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In this episode of Live Unashamed, hosts bring on their friend, Sam, to discuss the differences between sobriety and recovery. They explore the challenges and misconceptions surrounding these concepts, emphasizing that sobriety is about abstaining from undesirable behaviors, while recovery involves deeper healing. Personal stories highlight struggles with perfectionism, codependency, and self-sabotage. The conversation probes the reasons behind continued relapses despite significant recovery progress. The discussion aims to encourage listeners to reflect on their own journey and engage with the community for further support.

EP 128: Keeping it Real with Rhoda

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In this episode we invite Rhoda, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) and seasoned podcaster to discuss critical aspects of couples therapy and relationships. Rhoda shares her extensive experience in the mental health field, emphasizing the importance of hard conversations, self-honesty, and long-term thinking for relationship recovery—especially in the context of addiction. She provides actionable advice for both partners struggling with difficult subjects like relapse disclosure and managing criticism. Rhoda also highlights the role of mutual empowerment and authentic communication in rebuilding trust and fostering a more substantial connection. Essential tips for recognizing and changing negative narratives in relationships are discussed, making this episode a valuable resource for couples navigating complex emotional landscapes.

Listen to Rhoda's podcast: https://www.therapyideas.net/podcast/
Visit her website for over 450 pages of free information: https://www.therapyideas.net
For more info on relationships: https://www.therapyideas.net/relationships/

EP 127: The Therapy Brothers

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*This is a reposted episode from The Therapy Brothers Podcast* therapybros.com

In this special episode, Steve is interviewed by Tyler and Brannon Patrick, hosts of the Therapy Brothers Podcast. Steve shares his powerful and raw personal journey of addiction, recovery, and the reclamation of his own heart. He opens up about his struggles with addiction while in prominent church roles and the pivotal moments of grace that guided him towards healing. Steve emphasizes the importance of vulnerability, acceptance, and the support of a masculine brotherhood in overcoming personal demons and living a life aligned with one's true values. The discussion dives deep into the concept of 'godly masculinity' and how men can harness their inherent strengths in a positive and purposeful way.
Stay tuned for an upcoming episode where we dive deep and interview the Therapy Brothers!

EP 126: Q&A with Josh

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In this episode hosts Steven and James are joined by their friend Josh. They answer questions sent in by Josh and in doing so, they dive into a personal and candid discussion about recovery, touching on themes such as discipleship, shame, and the concept of being 'broken.' The conversation includes a deep dive into what it means to be 'recovered' versus 'in recovery,' the significance of self-care in a spiritual context, and the powerful idea that brokenness can lead to greater strength and beauty through divine grace.

EP 125: Gavin's Story

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In this episode, Steve and Chris embrace the power of vulnerability as they introduce Gavin, a guest who courageously shares his journey through addiction, shame, and recovery. The candid conversation goes into the deeper, poignant narrative of Gavin's experiences from teenage struggles with pornography and masturbation, through tumultuous high school years, and eventually, unexpected betrayal within his marriage. Through honest dialogue and unwavering support from the Unashamed & Unafraid community, Gavin discusses the trials of religious repentance processes, the emotional toll of addiction, and the crucial turning points leading to his ongoing recovery. This raw and inspiring episode underscores the significance of sharing one's story without stigma, connecting deeply with others, and finding hope in the most unexpected places. 

EP 124: The Heart of a Woman Retreat

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In this episode of Unashamed and Afraid, Steve welcomes Melanie, Michelle, and Sally to discuss their experiences with Heart of a Woman, a transformative Christian retreat designed to help women reconnect with God and themselves. Melanie shares the origins of Heart of a Woman, revealing how a call to create a dedicated retreat for women led to a decade-long journey of spiritual growth and female fellowship. Michelle and Sally, past attendees of the retreat, recount their varied experiences, emphasizing how the retreat provides a unique space for women to unplug from their daily lives, heal from trauma, and deepen their relationships with God through presentations, solo reflection time, and adventurous activities. Overall, Heart of a Woman aims to offer women a safe, supportive environment where they can explore their faith, build lasting connections, and return home with a renewed sense of spiritual and personal clarity.

*Go to TheHeartofaWoman.net and use code UNASHAMED24 to save $50 when you sign up! (Valid until September 10, 2024)

EP 123: Ian and Niccole's Story

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In this heartfelt episode, join hosts James and Steven as they welcome Ian and Niccole to the studio to share their profound journey of overcoming addiction and codependency through faith and mutual support. From their first meeting in college to their struggles with addiction and codependency, the couple provides an authentic narrative of their battles and breakthroughs. Key highlights include their initial honesty with each other about their respective struggles, the transformational moment when Niccole set healthy boundaries, and Ian's growing self-acceptance and self-love bolstered by his renewed faith. The episode emphasizes the importance of community, accountability, and a non-judgmental approach—focused on finding God's love and self-worth beyond destructive behaviors. Tune in for an inspiring discussion on overcoming shame, embracing vulnerability, and reclaiming hope.

EP 122: Jennifer's Story

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Jennifer suffered every type of abuse as a child. She was assaulted by her father, then by all the men that her mother brought home over the years. She came to feel that she was worthless, only there to make other people happy, and was filled with guilt. Years later, a therapist recommended she go get a massage to learn that not all touch was sexual. That backfired tremendously when her masseuse ended up raping her.

Jennifer was in a dark place, and as she watched her mother succumb to alzheimer's she was afflicted with suicidal thoughts. She finally asked God to give her a reason to live in any way that He could. The next morning, a sunrise miracle caused a deep and fundamental shift within her. That, combined with the reframing that she gained from an experiential, ultimately healed her soul and put her on the road to recovery. Jennifer’s story is a message of hope both to addicts and victims of abuse everywhere.

EP 121: Live Unashamed- Living with a Codependent (pt. 3)

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In the final episode of 'Codependency', the hosts discuss the intricacies of codependent relationships. The episode delves into the definition of codependency, its symptoms, and the difficulty individuals face in maintaining self-esteem, setting boundaries, and experiencing healthy intimacy. Through personal anecdotes and discussions, the team explores how codependency manifests and the challenges of overcoming it. They emphasize the importance of self-worth and boundaries in moving past codependent behaviors and introduce the concept that living in a codependent relationship is ultimately a choice. The conversation touches on various personal experiences and provides insights into the journey of recovery and transformation.

EP 120: Live Unashamed- How to Break My Codependency (pt. 2)

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Having already defined codependency, the team now addresses how to break out of its cycle. The first step is to recognize what our codependent behaviors even are. We cannot choose a different path if we don’t see the choices that are there. Furthermore, if we want to stop manipulating others into meeting our needs, we have to make peace with the fact that we really do have needs and that it is acceptable for us to own and address them. If we aren’t willing to give a full and honest voice to those needs, we are much more likely to get them met in covert, manipulative ways.

Another key takeaway is that we have to be willing to be honest, with no regard for the outcome. If we are not comfortable with sharing the truth that might make the other person mad at us and walk away from us, then we cannot live truthfully with that person. We have to be willing to suffer disconnection and be alone. We have to be willing to do the pain. “Enjoy that pain, there is beauty on the other side.”

EP 119: Live Unashamed- Am I Codependent? (pt. 1)

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The concept of codependency can be difficult to grasp and identifying it within ourselves or our relationships can prove challenging. In this episode, we break down the definition, assess its relevance, and offer strategies for recognizing and addressing it.

If you’ve grappled with resentment in a relationship or felt compelled to manage someone else’s emotions or beliefs, this discussion may provide hope, guidance, and even relief.

EP 118: Making Repair with Marc Pimsler

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We’re thrilled to welcome Marc Pimsler back for another episode! Marc, a lover of God, is a therapist, seeker, and a teacher with the heart of a student. He's in long-term recovery and he's here to talk about making repair.

Whether we refer to it as making repair, making amends, setting things right, or repairing relationships, there are ineffective or even harmful ways to approach it. Marc shows up with authenticity and passion to advocate for an effective approach. He begins by defining Addiction, Responsibility, and Accountability in a way that brings clarity to the discussion. We explore the reasons behind making repair, the work that must be done first, how to recognize unhealthy expectations, and strategies for navigating the process.

You can reach Marc via email at mvp@mvp-consulting.net or find him on Instagram @mpimsler and Facebook.

If this episode resonates with you, or if you know someone who needs a reminder of God’s open arms, please share the link to this episode with them. At Unashamed Unafraid, we are here to spread the words of hope and healing through Jesus Christ.

EP 117: Live Unashamed- Reaching Out, What Does it Mean?

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Alcoholics Anonymous' Dr. Bob's response to Bill Wilson after he complained that no one showed up for a meeting he spent the day organizing— "But you didn't drink today" — speaks volumes. In this episode, Steve, James, and Chris recognize the challenges of forming real connections and a supportive community while providing uplifting advice.

Tune in for insightful truths like these: Everyone fears rejection, and introverts face extra hurdles, but there are ways to overcome them. Each connection made is a victory against isolation, and reaching out pulls us out of our negotiations with our addiction.

EP 116: Christian and Kelle's Story

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Christian was born the middle of eight children and felt that he had to act out to get noticed. In his early adolescence he experimented with opiates, alcohol, a cigarette, and sex.

Kelle met Christian during their senior year of High School, the two started dating, and were quickly married after he returned home from his LDS mission. A few years and a motorcycle accident later, Christian went through a steady progression of painkillers, alcohol, gambling, and adultery. He became unable to hold down a job and disappeared for long stretches of time, Kelle and their four children unsure of when or if he would show up next. 

Christian and Kelle’s story is a testament to the fact that there is always a way back, that no soul is over and done, at least not so long as we are willing to open ourselves even a little to the light that is cracking its way into our hearts.